A Tribute to Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf

Wisdom of the Ages

"they are nowhere near the airport ..they are lost in the desert...they can not read a compass...they are retarded."

"Who are in control, they are not in control of anything - they don't even control themselves!"

"We are not afraid of the Americans. Allah has condemned them. They are stupid. They are stupid" (dramatic pause) "and they are condemned."

"Faltering forces of infidels cannot just enter a country of 26 million people and lay besiege to them! They are the ones who will find themselves under siege. Therefore, in reality whatever this miserable Rumsfeld has been saying, he was talking about his own forces. Now even the American command is under siege."

"Our estimates are that none of them will come out alive unless they surrender to us quickly."

[On surrenders] "Those are not Iraqi soldiers at all. Where did they bring them from?"

"Blair...is accusing us of executing British soldiers. We want to tell him that we have not executed anybody. They are either killed in battle, most of them get killed because they are cowards anyway, the rest they just get captured."

"They fled. The American louts fled. Indeed, concerning the fighting waged by the heroes of the Arab Socialist Baath Party yesterday, one amazing thing really is the cowardice of the American soldiers. we had not anticipated this."

"We will slaughter them, Bush Jr. and his international gang of bastards!"

"They are retreating on all fronts. Their military effort is a subject of laughter throughout the world."

"Those Iraqi fighters are slapping those gangsters on the face, and then when they flee, they will kick their backsides."

"We have shot down 2 Apache helicopters. Have the Americans said yet that they were shot down by their - what do they call it - friendly fire? No? Well... [dramatic pause, then smiles] ...not yet!"

"They are not in Najaf. They are nowhere. They are on the moon. They are snakes in the desert..."

"The United Nations....[is] a place for prostitution under the feet of Americans." - perhaps not altogether untrue...

and MSS's first - and only - truthful statement: "I speak better English than this villain Bush"


but what will he do now that "The progress of the war is so satisfactory, as several million infidel troops have killed themselves at the walls of baghdad and allah is roasting the stomachs of the rest in hell, that we see no longer any need for press briefings."?

suggestions:



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