it's a long way to tipperary!

Q: I've heard that people sometimes use Internet chat areas to
have "cybersex." What exactly is that?
A: This is when two people send explicitly steamy messages to
each other, back and forth, back and forth, faster and faster,
hotter and hotter, faster and faster and hotter and harder and
harder until OHHHH GODDDDDDDD!!!! They suddenly find that they
have a bad case of sticky keyboard, if you get my drift.

Q: That's disgusting!
A: Yes.

Q: Could you give an example?
A: Certainly.

Born2Bone: I want you NOW
HunniBunni: I want YOU now
Born2Bone: I want to take off your clothes
HunniBunni: Yes! YES!
Born2Bone: I'm taking off your clothes
HunniBunni: OH YESSSS

(LONG PAUSE)

HunniBunni: Is something wrong?
Born2Bone: I can't unhook your bra
HunniBunni: I'll do it
Born2Bone: Thanks. Oh my god! I'm touching your,umm, your...
HunniBunni: Copious bosoms?
Born2Bone: Yes! I'm touching ur tits
1ToAnnoy: Tits suck
HunniBunni: YES!
Born2Bone: Both of them!
HunniBunni: YESSS!!
Born2Bone: I'm taking off your panties!
HunniBunni: I'm not wearing any
Born2Bone: Oh, OK. You're naked! I'm touching your nakedness!
HunniBunni: YESSSSSS!!!
Wazootyman: Anybody here from Texas?
Born2Bone: No
HunniBunni: No
1ToAnnoy: Texas sucks
Born2Bone: I am becoming turgid in my manfulness!
HunniBunni: YES! YES YOU ARE!! YOU ARE A BULL! YOU ARE MY
GREAT BIG RAGING BULL STALLION!
Wazootyman: Hey, thanks
HunniBunni: Not you, Waz!!!!!
Born2Bone: I AM A STALLION! I AM A RAGING, BULGING BULL
STALLION, AND I AM THRUSTING MY ... MY ... ummm ...
HunniBunni: Your love knockwurst?
1ToAnnoy: Wazoo, you suck
Born2Bone: YES! I AM THRUSTING MY LOVE KNOCKWURST
INTO YOUR ... YOUR...
HunniBunni: Promise you won't laugh?
Born2Bone: Yes
HunniBunni: My passion persimmon
Born2Bone: LMAO
HunniBunni: You promised!
1ToAnnoy: Persimmons suck
Born2Bone: Sorry. OK, here goes I AM THRUSTING MY MASSIVE
KNOCKWURST OF LOVE INTO YOUR PASSION PERSIMMON!
HunniBunni: YES! YES! YES!
Born2Bone: OHHH! IT FEELS SO GOOD!! I FEEL POWERFUL!!
HunniBunni: YOU ARE POWERFUL, BORN2BONE!! I FEEL YOUR
POWER INSIDE ME!!!
Born2Bone: IT FEELS LIKE, LIKE ...
HunniBunni: Like what?
Born2Bone: IT FEELS JUST LIKE, OHMIGOD ... OHMIGOD ...
HunniBunni: TELL ME, BORN2BONE!! TELL WHAT IT FEELS
LIKE!!
Born2Bone: OH LORD IT FEELS LIKE... IT FEELS LIKE WHEN I
USED TO BREAK A TIE VOTE IN THE SENATE!
HunniBunni: What did you say?
Born2Bone: Whoops
HunniBunni: It feels like when you used to break a tie vote in
the Senate???????
Born2Bone: Umm, listen, what I meant was ...
HunniBunni: This is you, isn't it, Al? ISN'T IT?? YOU JERK!!!
YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE ATTENDING A STATE FUNERAL THIS AFTERNOON!!!
Born2Bone: Tipper?
HunniBunni: Whoops
1ToAnnoy: You guys suck

i've been on mc this whole bloody week 'cos of a 39 degree fever ( dont'cha just love 'em? ) and tonsillitis. the first two days were crap but i'm ok now. doctor wants me to rest at home nevertheless.

but because of that i missed my ffi - fit for instruction - medical certification so i've been rolled over to the next batch of airgraders. so i won't be going on the 2nd, probably a month later or so. its a pity i won't be going with my friends back from - aaahhh! - hendon, but in a way it isn't bad either. more time to slack and more time to study and practise ( on the cockpit mock-up we have in our room ).

i'm downloading monty python and the holy grail now. assuming i still remember my basic arithmetic, it'll take about 7 hours 45 minutes at an average speed of 25kbps. i just calculated that because i missed using my calculator.

now to find an excuse for using the "ln" function...

off the top of ST's home section:

"screw what she said. it was boring anyway." - kk women's and children's hospital patient, mdm sa'at, 26, on the strict rules which prohibit her 15 month old daughter from visiting her.


how quickly children grow these days.

i never knew there was such a thing as root beer schnapps. haha...root beer spirits. imagine that.

i was just thinking of taking more screenshots so you, too, could appreciate the beauty - make that comic beauty - of naked men and sumo wrestlers, but the video image in the screenshots keep showing up blank even though the rest of the screen turns up fine.

i'm sure there's a more efficient way of saving captures than this:
1. hit print screen
2. paste into ms paint
3. resize, crop etc and save as jpeg

what am i doing wrong?

while i'm on the subject of cool / funny vids here are some more you can download when you're bored. or if you're in the habit of leaving the computer on even if you're not using it, why not spend the time productively, by downloading videos? ( irony intended, thank you very much ). for the sake of the 'ol wallet, though, lets hope you've got unlimited access.

blink 182's first date - funny gags, set in the 60s - complete with big hair!

blink 182's what's my age again - the 3 of them running around the streets naked. not surprisingly, funny! by the way, its all censored, so you needn't fear seeing their swinging schlongs.

blink 182's the rock show - they spend the whole video throwing cash around - makes you feel guilty when you think of all the poor starvingchildren / landminevictims / uglypeople in iraq / cambodia / malaysia but it makes for a great video! e.g. they pick up some homeless guy off the streets, give him the first shower, shave and haircut he's seen in years, dress him up like a pimp, then buy him a lapdance. e.g. buying a new tv set and promptly clocking it with a baseball bat. e.g. bringing a vanload of bikin'ed babes to wash some lucky guy's car.

blink 182's man overboard - one word - midgets.

eminem's without me, lose yourself, fatboy slim's weapon of choice, jamiroquai's little l, limp bizkit's rollin', and most vids by sum41 - not funny, but just pretty cool.

weezer's hash pipe - sumo wrestlers! if that isn't good enough for you, then, singing sumo wrestlers!

weezer's photograph ( which, incidentally, the first weezer song i heard and made me start downloading more ) - weezer at their geeky best.


shoo. go get 'em!

hehehehehe. you should go download weezer's keep fishin' vid. besides being a great song, it features the muppets - what more could you want?




that's miss piggy attempting to seduce pat. he manages to escape by shutting her in her closet when she goes to "change into something more comfortable", and gets untied with the help of a passing - chasing his muppet chickens - muppet chef's cleaver.

even the two mean old muppets make an appearance!



mean old muppet 1: hey, they aren't half bad!
mean old muppet 2: nope, they're all bad!

when one is bored...


""Which cocktail are you?""
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